following the moon.

On the way home from daycare & work last night, after dark and almost 6pm, Penelope asked, "Why is the moon following us Mommy?" I might've died a little, mostly because I remember wondering the same thing as a kid, tucked into the backseat of my parent’s car on car rides that probably seemed much longer than they really were. 

The fragility of my kids' youth and innocence has really hit a chord with me this week, as the tension that comes into a home during remodels, busy seasons at work, the holidays, and general life with three very young ones, has been bottle-necking inside me. I'm realizing that stress is affecting my whole home, my kids, my animals even, and my need to protect my kids from hurt and worry has been feeling threatened. I keep repeating to myself that everything is a season, but it can be hard. And I can't help but wonder if, while I sat in the backseat as a wee one wondering about the moon, my parents were worried about protecting me from worry and hurt and the fragile state of my own innocence as a child? Maybe. Parenting is by far the hardest role I've taken on, and there are seasons that can be particularly harder. 

My husband wrote a song for Elliott back when he was tucked safety in my belly, before our knowledge of his heart problem, and it makes me cry these days every time I hear it. "I believe in sunshine after rain, even when the skies are full of gray." Keeping that phrase close to my heart today.